Grounding vs. Distraction

[TTC18]

I don't understand the difference. Grounding seems very much to be a form of distraction to me. 'Pay attention to THIS instead of THAT'
Can someone explain?

 

[Teamwork]

I think the aim in grounding is to use the bodies natural five senses to bring you back into the body. When upset or slightly dissociative the mind isnt always connecting to the body and is off in either flight, fight, fawn or freeze and all of those situations dont help you pay attention to what is going on in the body. So when we look for five things or smell or touch we come back to the place of the body and actually can feel ourselves connecting to it and calming down. When we can stay grounded, we can feel emotions or dysregulations and talk about them in a way that addresses the root trauma.

 

[MyWillow]

Some things can be grounding. Some things can be used as distraction. Some can be both. Yoga is always grounding for me - or causes insane anxiety. Interacting with my dogs is very grounding - or even the horses during my equine therapy session - after a flashback they have saved my @rse. Training my dogs can be grounding or a distraction. Walking can be grounding or be combined with grief and panic. Gardening can be grounding but also a distraction. Especially when I do it to a point of exhaustion and pain. Is the activity mindful? Are you experiencing it in the here and now? Or is it done to cause numbing or pain to distract from FEELING. Neither is right or wrong. Although mindfulness is ideal, choosing distraction sometimes helps me survive.

 

[ladee]

I do grounding when I am anxious. I do distraction when my mind won't shut off.

 

[Tornadic Thoughts]

I feel grounding is what helps me become tuned in, while distraction is what helps me tune out. Each can be achieved in various ways, depending on what I feel the need to tune into or tune out from.

 

[grit]

Hi tryingtocope 18
What do you need the grounding or distracting for?

To me, I used to mediate a lot before I even knew I was dissociating. I thought I was helping myself but actually I was just falling into more dissociation and loving it and it was not serving me good.

IMHO, if you are struggling with dissociation, the first thing you may need (and that worked for me) is can you tell you are very close to dissociating? How do you know you dissociated? What happens when you dissociate? Where are you? Do you fantasize about dissociation in such as I need space to be alone so I can dissociate or fall sleep or dream or be whatever?

If you do not know what dissociation looks like, feels like, and makes you do, it is hard to ground the self. Grounding will be like driving without knowing where you are going. You can drive good but lost still.

To me: grounding is what I do when I see dissociation coming. Distraction is what I do when I am dissociated already. Distraction is what makes my brain not notice I have dissociated. This has been my experience..

Hope this makes sense.

 

[TTC18]

Yes, that makes sense, @grit. I don't know why I need anything, to be honest, I'm just reading things and trying to figure out what I should be doing. I get a feeling like: 'stop talking to me so I can concentrate on the imaginary world in my head' often - which I interpret as dissociating. But if grounding is paying attention to my body, I don't want to do that, as it feels uncomfortable. I'm most happy and comfortable when I'm either being totally distracted by something outside my self (other people, a movie, doing something active, etc), or something inside myself (imaginary world). The thought of sitting and really paying attention to anything to do with myself makes me want to barf. When my T asks me how I'm feeling, I just say I feel nothing. Because when she asks me, I look at the wall, and look at the paint on the wall, and I don't feel anything because I'm looking at the wall and walls have no feelings.

 

[grit]

I remember one time you mentioned you run. Sorry if I am confusing you with someone else but if that was something you do, just pay attention when you are feeling running...what precipitates that?

that could be something you use to distract or ground but only you can know that if you pay attention the feeling you have before you run.

I can imagine it can be overwhelming when new to therapy for trauma.

 

[Sideways]

But if grounding is paying attention to my body, I don't want to do that, as it feels uncomfortable.

That’s just one way to ground, and it absolutely isn’t helpful for everyone.

Thinking of being ‘grounded’ as the exact opposite to being dissociated. If being dissociated is on auto-pilot, zoned out, your brain not really here - then being grounded is being here, now, directing your mind to something that is happening in the real world and registering it 100%.

When people tell me “I don’t know what being grounded feels like...”, the best example I can give that everyone seems to relate to: that moment you walk into a public toilet and it absolutely stinks. Your brain is 100% present in that moment, and you are registering exactly where you are, what you’re doing, and how unpleasant it is! Mind, body, emotions - everything is registering. That moment? Is grounded!

That can be achieved in a whole host of different ways. Some methods of distraction? Can help you achieve that. Some methods of mindfulness? Can help you achieve that. But there’s a tonne of ways you can get your brain to switch into the here and now, and being able to do that when you need is incredibly helpful. Practicing being grounded is also incredibly important if you spend a lot of time dissociated.

 

[TTC18]

pay attention when you are feeling running...what precipitates that?

Yep, I'm a runner. Today - went to real-life church for the first time in a long time. Too many friendly faces all focusing on ME made me want to run. Didn't want to hurt anyone's feelings, or be impolite, so I didn't run till the service was over. But while I was wanting to run, and while I was actually scampering to my car when it was all over, I was thinking, 'RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN' and feeling 'AAAHHHHHHHH' ... I'm not being flippant, I have tried to decipher something meaningful from what I was thinking/feeling, but it's just not any more than that. Wordless panic.

Your brain is 100% present in that moment, and you are registering exactly where you are, what you’re doing, and how unpleasant it is! Mind, body, emotions - everything is registering. That moment? Is grounded!

OK so it's the opposite of when something really bad happens, and you think 'I don't want to be here right now' - or when something horrible pops into your head and you think, 'I don't want to think this right now' or whatever, and you think of something else. ... I'm really really really good at 'just think about something else' and 'don't look at it, it'll just make it worse if you look' ... Logic dictates that if I've developed the skill of non-grounding, I should be able to develop a skill of grounding as well. But it seems to me that 'right now' and 'right here' are sort of distressing, so I'm not sure that focusing on them would make me feel better. I'll do it if I have to, though.

Thank you everyone for trying to explain this to me. I apologize for being dense - I just *really* don't understand this stuff. But I want to understand.

 

[Sideways]

Logic dictates that if I've developed the skill of non-grounding, I should be able to develop a skill of grounding as well.

Exactly. Dissociating (tuning out with your thoughts and your emotions) is part of ptsd because it’s a tip top coping strategy for overwhelming situations.

Practicing grounding is basically learning how to be present. Now that the trauma has passed, we don’t need to be dissociated in order to cope with everyday life. In fact, everyday life and processing our emotions potentially can’t happen until we learn how to be present (aka ‘grounded’).

It’s actually pretty scary for a lot of us. Being present does mean feeling the negative emotions that we’ve been avoiding our entire life.

But you can start somewhere else. Work on the grounding when you’re in good situations, or at least neutral situations. Practice and figure out which grounding strategies work best for you:)

 

[TTC18]

Thanks, that helps a lot. I think part of my issue is that my situation is sort of never-ending. (Long-term stalker) But I *can* find times when I do feel good. Hugging my dog. Petting my cat. Playing tag with my kiddo. I feel like i do that already though - when it's a *good* moment, I just roll around in it like Scrooge McDuck. Like reveling in it. Swimming in it. GOOD FEELS GOOD. lol...