I never really thought of myself as strong before, but I am starting to look back on my life. I was always afraid of being exposed as unlovable and undesirable.
However, I am reminded of what my trauma therapist once said.... she said, "You don't have to please everyone, the fact that you please someone is enough to dispel your belief that you are undesirable." "Some do find you desirable, so your fears are based on lies that you were told when you were young." "It is not a fact that can be proven in court, it was a lie and you are loved by many despite your fears."
To live and fight off those types of deep-seated fears for 6 decades, makes me much stronger than I ever gave myself credit for. I may not be everyone's cup of tea, but that doesn't make me unlovable or undesirable. It makes me human and I now see, a stronger man than I ever knew before.